


Stubborn Insecurities

by GaHoolianGirl



Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Established Relationship, Happy Ending, Healthy Relationships, Hurt/Comfort, Light Angst, M/M, Married Couple, Please indulge me and try out this rarepair please, Post-Canon, Post-Golden Deer Route (Fire Emblem: Three Houses)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-05
Updated: 2020-05-05
Packaged: 2021-03-02 18:26:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,032
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24021292
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GaHoolianGirl/pseuds/GaHoolianGirl
Summary: Insecurities were stubborn things, Ignatz found. They could be dismissed and disproven for as long as you lived, but there would be nights when they simply snuck up on you and burrowed into your mind once more.Tonight was one such night.Ferdinand had gone to bed before him, as he insisted that he wanted to complete the final touches on his current painting before he slept. Concerned but understanding, his husband had agreed, so long as he would to come to bed as soon as he had finished.That was one promise broken.
Relationships: Ferdinand von Aegir/Ignatz Victor
Comments: 6
Kudos: 20





	Stubborn Insecurities

**Author's Note:**

> It seems I am only really able to wrote 2 types of things for 3H with any consistency: Ferdibert, and then rare pairs with those two. Welp, here we are. 
> 
> I wrote this with it being in the same universe as _[Mesmerizing](https://archiveofourown.org/works/22518250)_ and _[Come Live with Me and Be My Love](https://archiveofourown.org/works/22611439)_ but you absolutely don't need to read those to get this onez no specific events are mentioned.

Insecurities were stubborn things, Ignatz found. They could be dismissed and disproven for as long as you lived, but there would be nights when they simply snuck up on you and burrowed into your mind once more.

Tonight was one such night.

Ferdinand had gone to bed before him, as he insisted that he wanted to complete the final touches on his current painting before he slept. Concerned but understanding, his husband had agreed, so long as he would to come to bed as soon as he had finished.

That was one promise broken.

Ignatz did most of his painting in a small drawing room close to their bedroom; the first thing Ferdinand did when he moved in was have all the unnecessary furniture cleared out so it could be his studio. It was a kind gesture that had warmed his heart at the time, but now it made guilt settle into his gut.

_ He does so much for me... I feel like there's nothing I could do for him. _

Some functionally attractive paintings were nowhere near the level of being given a home, the opportunity to follow his dreams, and boundless adoration that he received.

He knew, he  _ knew _ that there was nothing to gain from thinking this way. That he was most likely wrong, and that it would pain the person he loved most if he knew.

But the heart was so rarely convinced by logic.

So there he sat, staring blankly at his finished painting as his candles melted to their last minutes, flickering flames casting harsh, shifting shadows upon the whole room. He had thought the worst of his anxieties had been left in his youth, but the Goddess had not been so kind.

He likely would have stayed there even longer, if he was not interrupted by the (sad and resigned, but unsurprised) voice of his husband leaning on the doorframe.

"I believe we had an agreement, no?"

Being spoken to made him start, quickly snapping out of his daze like he had never been in it, scrambling to clean up his supplies, "J-Just a minute-"

"I think not," Ferdinand's voice was soft, and he walked over to Ignatz, looking angelic and peaceful in his pearl white nightshirt, "We can clean up in the morning. Tonight, you rest."

"Wha-"

Before he can speak further, he is scooped up off the ground and into Ferdinand's arms, who grinned radiantly at him, "Please, rest. I know your habit of mentally exhausting yourself along with your body, my dear. None of that tonight."

Ignatz wished he could protest, but he did feel his body grow heavy with tiredness now that he was no longer supporting his own weight. These past few weeks he had been doing his best to keep up with his partner's indomitable work ethic (he specialized in negotiating trade with their neighbors) along with his commissions so perhaps... a break was in order.

Despite how weak it made him feel.

Ferdinand held him tightly as he toured the room, snuffing out each candle until they were in total darkness, save the pale moonlight that gave them just enough visibility to make it back to their room. When they arrived, the paladin set his beloved artist on the bed, slowly undressing him for the night.

"I'm perfectly capable of doing it myself..."

"I know. But you worry me at times," he admitted with a small, bittersweet smile, "You are very earnest, but also very hard on yourself. So indulge me by letting me spoil you some."

Sighing through his nose, Igntaz took off his glasses and put them aside, pinching the bridge of his nose, "You do that enough already."

Misunderstanding his meaning, Ferdinand laughed, "What greater pleasure is there for a married man but to spoil his husband? I would be derelict in my duties it-"

"That's not it!"

Both of them blinked widely. Ignatz was not the type to raise his voice, so they were both startled by the outcry.

"You do so much for me, and yet-" he squeezed his hand into a fist before releasing it and letting it fall limply into his lap, "I always feel like I'm falling behind you. I just..."

He sighed again, reaching a hand, fingers calloused from long hours pulling bowstrings as well as with charcoal in hand, out to cup his husband's cheek, "Don't want you to regret me."

The rebuttal he received was immediate and impassioned, "I have never heard such nonsense! You bring me joy like I have never known. Your point of view always enlightens me, and your very presence calms me. Just knowing you are here with me makes me happier than words could express. I need no material benefit from you."

Ferdinand took the hand on his cheek in his own and brought it to his lips to kiss, before holding it against his chest, right by his heart, "You nourish my very soul."

"You are like the sun," Ignatz replied, eyes tightening but unable to suppress a smile, "I'm unable to look away, and I always get burned, but yet I need you to even take my next breath. I stand no chance against you, even now..."

"I think we are just a pair of very happy, but very tired, men who are in great need of rest." 

They did not bother dressing Ignatz in his nightshirt, opting just to leave him in his half unbuttoned shirt for the night. They settled onto the bed, Ignatz held tight against Ferdinand's chest.

"I am sure a mind as creative as yours has many imaginative ways to deceive you, but I swear that I never shall. I love you," Ferdinand said quietly, parting his husband's bangs so he could place a kiss upon his forehead. Unable to say anything in return besides a mumbled "I love you too," Ignatz simply snuggled in closer, sighing, letting his exhausted eyelids fall shut, perfectly content and happy.

Insecurities were stubborn things that always seemed to return, but each time they were dismissed it took a little longer, and Ignatz was confident that one day, his love for his husband... and himself, would banish them for good.•

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this at like 1am for a bud so like sorry if it comes off a smidge rambly but I think it's p okay. Let me know what you thought!


End file.
